15 'Classic' Films That Are Actually Unbearably Boring

Now, we all know that some films achieve a status of 'cult classic', endearing themselves to audiences for reasons that transcend their cinematic merits. Maybe they're quirky, they're odd, or they're so bad they're good.

But today, let's look at fifteen 'classic' films that, despite their esteemed reputation, may be better suited as a substitute for melatonin.

Updated on December 6th, 2023 by Louise Everitt: This article has been refreshed with new entries and some additional insights and trivia to keep things exciting and relevant for you. We've added new content, so revisit to see what's changed and stay informed.

1. Casablanca

This revered titan of the silver screen, often lauded for its timeless romance and crisp dialogue, seems to have misplaced its allure for some. Despite multiple valiant attempts, it appears that the magic of Rick's Café Américain is more likely to induce yawns than yearnings.

2. Chariots of Fire

Chariots of Fire is a film that, in a surprise twist of fate, outran 'Raiders of the Lost Ark' for the Best Picture Oscar in 1982. This cinematic slow jog – praised for its portrayal of British grit and determination – seems to have left some viewers gasping for more excitement, perhaps wondering if the real lost artifact was the film's ability to engage.

3. Pride & Prejudice

While this classic has twirled its way into many a heart, it seems not everyone is keen to join the ball. It turns out that a disdain for period pieces wasn't the culprit; rather, it's specifically the Pemberley estate's residents that fail to stir excitement.

4. The Great Gatsby

Fitzgerald's opus, transformed into a visual spectacle, seems to have left some feeling like they've been whirled through a two-hour kaleidoscope of Roaring Twenties excess. Instead of a mesmerizing journey, it's more akin to being stuck in a never-ending, headache-inducing trailer where the actual movie is forever just out of reach.

5. Forrest Gump

This tapestry of 20th-century Americana, stitched together through the eyes of the lovable Gump, has been likened to a collection of skits. Each episode, from shrimp boats to presidential meetings, could stand alone – a sort of 'choose your own Forrest adventure'. While Tom Hanks' performance is applauded, the film's narrative is viewed by some as typical Oscar bait, especially when stacked against the gritty brilliance of 'The Shawshank Redemption' or the eclectic pulp of 'Pulp Fiction'.

6. 2001: A Space Odyssey

Kubrick's vision of the future is undeniably ambitious. A giant black slab catalyzes the evolution of apes into man, and another slab found on the moon sets off an interstellar journey to Jupiter. But for all its technological marvels and psychedelic sequences, we spend a chunk of the runtime watching astronauts perform mundane tasks in eerie silence. No offense, Kubrick, but if I wanted to watch someone eat their lunch in real-time, I'd just join my co-workers in the break room.

7. The English Patient

A harrowing tale of a doomed romance set against the backdrop of World War II. Lovely, right? Only if you have the patience to sit through two hours of Ralph Fiennes being bandaged and moaning while his life story is revealed in slow drips. The film is a bit like a pot roast that's been left in the oven for too long – rich in flavor, but dry and tough to swallow.

8. The Seventh Seal

Ingmar Bergman's allegorical classic sees a knight playing chess with Death during the Black Death. Sounds like an absolute romp, doesn't it? While the existential themes resonate, watching the knight pontificate on life, death, and faith for ninety minutes can feel like being trapped in a philosophy undergrad's dorm room. Without the cheap beer.

9. Lawrence of Arabia

This is a sprawling epic that delves into the life of T.E. Lawrence, his experiences during World War I, and the intricate politics of the time. However, the film's fascination with desert vistas turns a vast, arid expanse into an unofficial character, often prioritizing landscape over plot development. Honestly, there's only so many times you can see Lawrence squint at the horizon before you start squinting at your watch.

10. Citizen Kane

Widely regarded as the best film ever made, Orson Welles' magnum opus is admittedly a game-changer in cinematic storytelling. But let's be honest, for many of us, the real mystery isn't "What is Rosebud?" but rather, "When will this movie end?"

11. Barry Lyndon

Another Kubrick creation, this period drama is a meticulous depiction of 18th-century European society. Sadly, Kubrick's attention to historical detail is inversely proportional to the pacing of the plot. Watching Ryan O'Neal's social ascent and descent could make a snail impatient.

12. Last Year at Marienbad

In this French avant-garde film, a man tries to convince a woman that they met last year at Marienbad. It's a cinematic riddle, a puzzle of time and memory. However, the movie's dream-like logic can quickly turn into a nightmare of confusion. If you thought Inception was complex, hold on to your beret, mon amie.

13. The Birth of a Nation

The Birth of a Nation is an undisputed pioneer in the world of film, with D.W. Griffith's 1915 release showcasing groundbreaking narrative and cinematographical techniques. The film tells a sprawling story of two families on opposite sides of the Civil War. However, its problematic portrayal of racial themes and its runtime, longer than some flights I've been on, make it a true test of endurance. The groundbreaking techniques are overshadowed by the film's overtly racist sentiments and wooden characterizations that might make a decent bedtime story, but not a captivating watch.

14. Gone with the Wind

The legendary romantic epic, set against the backdrop of the American Civil War, is a film of many wonders. Vivien Leigh's fierce portrayal of Scarlett O'Hara and Clark Gable's charm as Rhett Butler certainly do have an alluring appeal. However, the film's almost four-hour duration and melodramatic dialogue can feel like a never-ending Scarlett letter that you're forced to read. As Rhett famously says, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn," and after two hours, you might find yourself echoing the sentiment.

15. Dr. Zhivago

David Lean's Dr. Zhivago is an epic, sweeping narrative of love and loss set in the backdrop of the Russian Revolution. The film's extravagant production design and the captivating love triangle at its center have made it a revered classic. However, the movie stretches the very definition of 'epic' to its limits, and not necessarily in a good way. For many, traversing the frozen landscapes and navigating the convoluted political narrative could be as challenging as surviving a Siberian winter. The love story, which should be the film's beating heart, often gets lost in the sub-zero temperatures of Lean's snowy spectacle.